Daddy's Little Girl (as if she had a choice)
Jenn Said:
This third trimester is kicking my ass. I haven’t posted in weeks (maybe even a month) I hate my job, I’m a total emotional wreck, I’m in a ton of pain, and I’m feeling a bit guilty that I’ve been hangin a bit on Mike for support with Allie. The baby isn’t even here yet and I’m not able to play with her like I want, or put her to bed every night, or any of the other million things that I want to do with her. This is supposed to be the calm before the storm where I spend as much alone time with Allie as I can because it will never be the same for her again, and I can’t. And Allie is showing it too. She’s back to wanting Mike most of the time and not me. Of course, being that emotional wreck I mentioned before isn’t helping in this situation. Not only that, but once the baby is born I’m going to really have to hang heavily on Mike for support. Especially with a c-section it’s gonna be really hard until I’m healed. I’m afraid that, as strong and as wonderful as Mike is that he’s gonna crack under the pressure a bit. *cringe*
Mike Said:
Yes, Jenn has been uncomfortable for months now. I can see it all taking an toll on her. I'm not going to lie. It's going to be rough going for a while. I'm going to have to help Jenn do even the simplest things that she could normally do for herself. I remember how much trouble she had after she had Allie, and this is going to be even tougher. I feel badly for her and am doing whatever I can to make things easier on her, but already I only have about 45 min to an hour for me every day. There are times when I know Jenn really can't help, and I don't resent her for it at all, but I start to lose my patience and can't really walk away for a second. I just have to force myself to stay calm during the situation. I try not to take it out on Jenn, but sometimes it happens. I always acknowledge that I'm doing it right after and say I'm sorry. I have some things to do in the house still to get it it ready for Luke, but have no time. Hopefully I'll figure it out soon, cause his room is no where near ready.
Regardless, I know we'll get thru it. It's just going to be an adjustment period
This third trimester is kicking my ass. I haven’t posted in weeks (maybe even a month) I hate my job, I’m a total emotional wreck, I’m in a ton of pain, and I’m feeling a bit guilty that I’ve been hangin a bit on Mike for support with Allie. The baby isn’t even here yet and I’m not able to play with her like I want, or put her to bed every night, or any of the other million things that I want to do with her. This is supposed to be the calm before the storm where I spend as much alone time with Allie as I can because it will never be the same for her again, and I can’t. And Allie is showing it too. She’s back to wanting Mike most of the time and not me. Of course, being that emotional wreck I mentioned before isn’t helping in this situation. Not only that, but once the baby is born I’m going to really have to hang heavily on Mike for support. Especially with a c-section it’s gonna be really hard until I’m healed. I’m afraid that, as strong and as wonderful as Mike is that he’s gonna crack under the pressure a bit. *cringe*
Mike Said:
Yes, Jenn has been uncomfortable for months now. I can see it all taking an toll on her. I'm not going to lie. It's going to be rough going for a while. I'm going to have to help Jenn do even the simplest things that she could normally do for herself. I remember how much trouble she had after she had Allie, and this is going to be even tougher. I feel badly for her and am doing whatever I can to make things easier on her, but already I only have about 45 min to an hour for me every day. There are times when I know Jenn really can't help, and I don't resent her for it at all, but I start to lose my patience and can't really walk away for a second. I just have to force myself to stay calm during the situation. I try not to take it out on Jenn, but sometimes it happens. I always acknowledge that I'm doing it right after and say I'm sorry. I have some things to do in the house still to get it it ready for Luke, but have no time. Hopefully I'll figure it out soon, cause his room is no where near ready.
Regardless, I know we'll get thru it. It's just going to be an adjustment period
Jenn Said:
THEN, as I continue to complain, I go to pick up Allie from school the other day and they tell me that they had a child that was diagnosed with the Coxackie Virus. Which apparently could be no big deal to Allie but could be a potential big deal for me and/or Luke. Supposedly there are some studies that if I get the virus I can pass it through the placenta and give it to Luke. He could get any number of things from it including but not limited to Viral Meningitis. WONDERFUL!!! 3 days later Allie has a fever. *sigh* So now, I have to what? Stay away from her as much as possible? Great, thanks, cause I wasn't having that problem AS IS!!!! Then, Mike tells me he doesn't feel well either. So I get the pleasure of telling him: "Gee babe, I know your not feeling well but you need to change Allie's diaper, and put her to bed, and play with her, and wipe her nose, even MORE than you normally do, cause I can't be in contact with her just in case.
THEN, as I continue to complain, I go to pick up Allie from school the other day and they tell me that they had a child that was diagnosed with the Coxackie Virus. Which apparently could be no big deal to Allie but could be a potential big deal for me and/or Luke. Supposedly there are some studies that if I get the virus I can pass it through the placenta and give it to Luke. He could get any number of things from it including but not limited to Viral Meningitis. WONDERFUL!!! 3 days later Allie has a fever. *sigh* So now, I have to what? Stay away from her as much as possible? Great, thanks, cause I wasn't having that problem AS IS!!!! Then, Mike tells me he doesn't feel well either. So I get the pleasure of telling him: "Gee babe, I know your not feeling well but you need to change Allie's diaper, and put her to bed, and play with her, and wipe her nose, even MORE than you normally do, cause I can't be in contact with her just in case.
Seriously, we must be the perfect match, cause if we're not fighting over stuff these last couple of months....I really think we could get through anything.
*fingers crossed it stays that way for the next couple of months*
I guess this isn't as much of a dad said mom said post as a bitch session from the two of us.....but hey....it's what's going on over here at the Maniacal Household.
I guess this isn't as much of a dad said mom said post as a bitch session from the two of us.....but hey....it's what's going on over here at the Maniacal Household.
Labels: Mike and Jenn
posted by Jenn at 10:50 AM
5 Say it:
It's as good a post as any!
We can totally relate, the 'lil man was 17 mos old when I had my c-section w/ the 'lil lady. I was pretty big, uncomfortable & awkward toward the end and he didn't understand. He also didn't understand when I got home that I couldn't pick him up.... or that Mammy isn't a jungle gym.
It'll be tough for a few weeks, but it won't be forever
Good Luck
I wish I could give both of you a big hug right now. BOTH of you. Since I'm slightly ahead of you in the game with a 5 week old and a 21 month old, I having been noddling my head vigorously throughout this post.
I wish I could say it magically gets better. In some ways it does - I am SO glad to have my body back and be able to lay on my STOMACH on the floor, playing cars with my son and reading books. I really missed doing that. Especially wrestling around with him. I missed that the most, I think. But it doesn't get exponentially worse, either. And the payoff is that you will have TWO sweeties to snuggle. And you will have so much fun watching Allie fall in love with her new brother. Hold on. :-)
If it helps, my son has totally been into his daddy these past few months, but has been coming around in the past few weeks.
I can relate. Lately, people have been saying things like "not much longer, you're almost there." Inside my head I'm thinking "Are you kidding me, there's SEVEN more weeks left. SEVEN! I can't do SEVEN more weeks of this!!!"
BTW: Who's Luke? Did you name little Maniacial without telling us?
Hey! Stop beating yourself up over there - this site is about everything (and I mean, EVERYTHING) mom & dad related. And that means that what you and Mike are going through are completely normal and valid.
In a way it is the calm before the storm of having another little one enter your household. The fact that you're in the last stretch only puts more pressure on you both to be 'ready'. But really, how 'ready' is being ready? You're both under a tremendous amount of pressure and are trying to consider one another's feelings and capabilities. You're doing the best you can under the circumstances and, despite the impatience and little squabbles, you're still being really considerate and loving.
Don't despair - you have each other, that's the important thing. Allie's a tough girl, she will understand and get through it right along with her kickass parents. Trust me!
Hugs to you both!!!!
Stop scaring me! LOL. You did it once (fantastically by the way) and you can do it again. Breathe.
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